Values Before Valuables: Creating a Family Legacy

You’ve spent decades building wealth through hard work, smart decisions, and maybe a few sleepless nights along the way. Now you’re asking yourself the question that keeps many successful families up at night: “How do I make sure this wealth helps my kids rather than hurts them?”

This is one of the most common concerns we hear from clients, and for good reason. Without the right preparation, inheritance can feel more like a burden than a blessing.

The Real Challenge for Self-Made Success Stories

Here’s what we’ve learned after 50+ years of working with families like yours: The most successful wealth transfers aren’t about the size of the estate. They’re about passing down the mindset that created it.

Think about your own journey. You probably learned the value of a dollar through experience—maybe a first job, building a business from scratch, or making tough choices between spending and saving. Your kids haven’t walked that same path.

And that’s okay. But it means we need to be intentional about creating those learning opportunities.

The Immigrant vs. Native Wealth Experience

As wealth management expert Jim Grubman points out, there’s a fundamental difference between building wealth (“immigrants” to wealth) and inheriting it (“natives” to wealth). Without a connection to the source, sacrifices, and journey of wealth creation, future generations often struggle with managing it effectively.

The biggest mistake we see families make? Not communicating, not educating, not sharing stories. We believe when heirs don’t understand the values and experiences that shaped your financial decisions, they miss the context that makes those resources meaningful.

Start With Stories, Not Spreadsheets

One of the most powerful tools you have isn’t in your investment portfolio—it’s your personal story. Share those pivotal moments:

• The first big risk you took in business
• That time you almost threw in the towel (but didn’t)
• How you decided between the safe job and the entrepreneurial leap
• The mentors who shaped your thinking about money

These stories do what no trust document can: They provide context for why you made certain financial decisions and what values guided you.

The Strategic Approach to Family Wealth

Just as building wealth requires strategic thinking, preparing your family to manage it demands the same thoughtful approach. At Linscomb, we’ve found that successful wealth transitions require:

• A clear vision for where you want your family’s financial future to go
• A personalized plan to help get you there
• The right team to provide guidance along the way
• Getting everyone aligned with appropriate incentives and a supportive culture

This strategic mindset is what built your wealth in the first place—and it’s the same approach that we believe will help you preserve it across generations.

Creating Real-World Money Experiences

Here are some strategies families we work with use to build financial confidence across generations:

For Kids (Ages 8-12): • Set up a simple three-jar system: spending, saving, giving • Let them earn money through age-appropriate tasks • Allow small mistakes (like spending all their money on candy and having none left for that toy they wanted)

For Teens: • Consider opening a custodial investment account under parental supervision • Allow them to research companies they’re familiar with • Review the account together quarterly • Consider matching their charitable donations to causes they care about

For Young Adults: • Include them in family philanthropy discussions • Share your annual giving strategy • Ask their input on charitable allocations • Begin introducing them to your advisory team

Philanthropy in Action: A Family’s Journey

One Linscomb client family found a particularly effective approach using their donor-advised fund. Each holiday season, the parents and their adult children would gather for two important meetings. First, they’d discuss the parents’ finances and plans in general terms. Then, as a family, they’d review the investment strategy for their charitable fund and make collaborative decisions about distributions.

Over time, this annual tradition accomplished multiple goals: it gradually introduced the parents’ overall financial situation, helped work through complex family dynamics, and shared values around the purpose of their wealth. Since helping others is generally a positive conversation topic, it provided an easier starting point than diving into more challenging discussions about business entities or complex estate structures.

Family Meetings That Actually Work

Forget the stuffy boardroom approach. We’ve found that the most effective family financial discussions often happen:

• During annual family vacations
• Over casual dinners • At the ranch or lake house
• Anywhere that feels natural to your family

Start with topics everyone can engage with, like charitable giving or family values. Numbers can come later.

We’ve learned that every family is unique—there’s no one-size-fits-all approach. That’s why we help families understand where they are, create a vision for what they want to achieve, and implement a personalized plan of action. For some families, this might mean starting with basic introductions and financial education before moving on to collaborative decision-making and formal family governance structures.

Using Philanthropy as Your Teaching Tool

Want to see your values in action? Philanthropy provides the perfect classroom. When families work together on charitable giving, they:

• Practice evaluating financial information
• Learn to align money with purpose
• Experience the joy of making an impact
• Build decision-making skills as a team

Consider setting up a family giving fund where each member gets to direct a portion. Watch how quickly they learn to research organizations and think strategically about impact.

At Linscomb, we’ve experienced this firsthand through our partnership with the Alzheimer’s Association. As a firm committed to helping families navigate life’s challenges, supporting an organization that addresses a condition affecting so many families feels like a natural extension of our mission. Many of our client families have been or will be impacted by dementia or Alzheimer’s, making this cause particularly meaningful to our community.

Beyond the Legal Documents

Your estate plan is crucial, but it’s just the framework. The real legacy happens in the conversations, experiences, and values you share along the way.

We’ve seen families take many different approaches to these conversations. Some gather during annual vacations, others over casual dinners, and some at their second homes. The key is finding what feels natural for your family—no PowerPoints or formal agendas required. Just honest conversation about values and vision.

When families create these opportunities for open dialogue, something powerful happens. Adult children begin to understand not just what they might inherit, but why their parents structured things a certain way. More importantly, they feel prepared to carry those values forward.

Your Next Step

Building a values-based legacy doesn’t require a complete overhaul of your life. Start small:

1. Share one story about your financial journey at your next family gathering
2. Include your adult children in one philanthropic decision this year
3. Set up a simple money-learning experience for your grandchildren

At Linscomb Wealth, we’ve guided families through this process for over five decades. We understand that every family’s situation is unique, and we’re here to help you create an approach that fits your values and goals.

Ready to start a conversation about transforming your wealth into a lasting legacy? Let’s explore what might work for your family.